What happens in the body and mind when we experience stressful or traumatic events?
When traumatic things happen that are shocking to our system, including the current shelter in place and fears around illness and financial security etc, our bodies go into a survival response state. Under threat our body is wired to protect us. This is a normal human experience. Our physical and emotional survival depend on our autonomic defenses. In order to help us get out of these states which often feel like we are “hijacked” we have to be able to recognize them.
Below are a list of the 5 Autonomic Defensive Response States our bodies are naturally wired to access and signs to help you know if you may be in one of those states:
Fight: Hyper-vigilance, explosive anger, judgmental, mistrusting, controlling, hostile, rigid, self destructive
Flight: wanting to escape, fantasizing, numbing, binge watching, chronic worry, addiction, compulsion, spacy and foggy, chronic checking of smart phones or devices
Freeze:terrified, panic attacks, unable to think or act, no voice, guarded, frozen, heart racing, social anxiety
Submit: shame, trouble saying no, passive, self critical, people pleasing, feel worthless, over care taking of others
Attach Cry for Help: intense loneliness, fear of being abandoned, difficulty being alone and wanting to chronically reach for others, clinging, waiting by the phone
When we are in these states our nervous system is either hyper or hypo- aroused. As our bodies go into these states, which throw us out of our normal “window of tolerance”, we are unable to think and feel at the same time with ease. Our nervous systems are either over or under activated. We lose our wisdom, capacity to have “right size feelings”, and capacities to think clearly. We lose our ability to feel calm, curious, compassionate and caring to ourselves and others. If you are noticing it is hard to access these qualities it probably means your system is in a state of hyper or hypo arousal and you can look through the resources below to find some specific tools to help regulate your nervous system and regain access to these abilities
How to know I am in hyper-arousal which includes fight, flight and freeze
You may feel an urgency to act, feel overstimulated, unsafe, hyper-vigilant, panicked, terrified, rageful, ruminative, overwhelmed, have difficulty sleeping or a loss of appetite
What should I do if I am in a state of hyper-arousal?
When we are hyper-aroused our nervous systems need help regulating, slowing down and getting more grounded.
Try these:
Orienting: Look around the room you are in and name objects i.e. find 3 blue things, find 4 round things, find 5 smooth objects etc. Keep doing this for about 5 minutes until you notice your breathing slow down, you feel more present, and have more connection in your body
Grounding through the body: Sit in a chair upright with your back supported and your feet uncrossed on the floor. Bring your attention to your breath for a few moments. Then begin to orient to your feet pressing down into the floor. Spend a few minutes using the muscles in your legs to push your feet into the floor to gain a sense of “ground” beneath you.
Hand on heart and belly - Place a hand on your heart and a hand on your belly. It may help to lie down on the floor or a bed. Let your attention rest on the heat being generated, the pressure of your hands on your heart and belly, and the rise and fall of your belly and chest.
Box Breathing: Take a deep breath in through your nose for a count of 5, hold for a count of 3, exhale through your mouth like you are blowing through a straw for a count of 8, and allow your body to deflate. Repeat for at least 12 rounds or until you notice a felt sense of your body settling
How to know if I am hypo-aroused which includes submit and cry for help
You may feel numb in your body and mind, shut down, chronically exhausted, disconnected, disengaged, ashamed, deadened, depressed, sleep too much, and soothe with food.
What should I do if I am in a state of hypo-arousal?
When we are hypo-aroused our nervous system needs help “waking up” and becoming more engaged to help with normal every day life activities.
Try these:
Activate the body through opposing pressure points - sit in a chair and push on the sides of your thighs inward with the palms of your hands, at the same time push your thighs out using the muscles in your legs to make equal and opposite points of pressure in your lower body.
Lengthen and send energy up through the spine and head - sit in a chair with your back supported. Bring your attention to your breath for a few moments. Then bring your attention to your spine and imagine being able to life your spine as though a string was pulling you up. Let the spine lengthen and lift and let that spread to the neck and head feeling the energy move upward through the body.
Do activities that up-regualte your nervous system i.e. downward dog yoga pose, tree pose, shoulder stand or head stand, jumping jacks.
For more ideas please check out this resources page that has links to online meditations, dance, and exericise.